Monologues from Chicago

Roxie Hart: Hey, why is the hurry? Amos ain't be home until midnight. Freddie? Fred? Hey, you know, I don't like you to feel like I'm nagging or anything. But don't you think it's about time for me to meet your friend down at the Onyx? It's been a month since you told him about me. I know. Cause that was the night they met Kelly, plus her husband and her sister. You know, they said you found them in a kit together. Guess from where it from. Amos opened it to somebody else. I throw him a party. - You're not going away, right? I've been thinking a lot about my anthem. Whenever I get a really good idea, i write it down at my diary before it puts off in my head. And you know what've come to me? The other day, that all the really knock-out acts. Have something more different going on, you know? Like, a signature bed. And I thought my thing could be a loaf. Give them just enough to feel hungry but always leave them one more. Once I get a name for myself. Maybe we can open up a club in Varum, you know? You could run it, and I could be the headliner.

Liz: You know how people have these little habits that get you down. Like Bernie. Bernie liked to chew gum. No, not chew. Pop. So, I came home this one day and I am really irritated, and looking for a little sympathy and there's Bernie layin' on the couch, drinkin' a beer and chewin'. No, not chewin'. Popin'. So, I said to him, I said, "Bernie, you pop that gum one more time..." And he did! So I took the shotgun off the wall and fired two warning shots......into his head.

Annie: I met Ezekiel Young from Salt Lake City about two years ago and he told me he was single and we hit it off right away. So, we started living together. He'd go to work, he'd come home, I'd mix Him a drink, we'd have dinner. And then I found out, "Single" he told me? Single, my ass. Not only was he married. ...oh, no, he had six wives. One of those Mormons, you know. So that night when he came home from work. I mixed him his drink as usual. You know, some guys just can't hold their arsenic!

Velma: My sister, Veronica, and I had this double act and my husband, Charlie, traveled around with us. Now for the last number in our act, we did these 20 acrobatic tricks in a row, one, two, three, four, five... Splits, spread eagles, back flips, flip flops, one right after the other. Well, this one night before the show we are in a hotel Cicero, the three of us, sittin' up in a hotel room, boozin' and havin' a few laughs and we ran out of ice, so I went out to get some. I come back, open the door And there's Veronica and Charlie doing Number Seventeen -the spread eagle. Well, I was in such a state of shock, I completely blacked out. I can't remember a thing. It wasn't until later, when I was washing the blood off my hands I even knew they were dead.

Roxie Hart: You know, I always wanted to have my name on the papers. Before I met Amos, I used to date this wealthy dude, ugly bootlegger. He used to take me out and show me off. Ugly guys like to do that. Once it said in the paper, gangland alcopaly seen a shade Vito with cute blonde. That was me. You know all my life, I wanted to have my own act. But, no... Always no, they always turned me down. One big world-full of no. And then Amos came along. Save sweet Amos. Who never says no. I've never done this before. But you know, it's such a special night. And you are such a great audience! And I really feel like I can talk to you, you know? So forget what you read in the papers. And forget what you heard on the radio. Because...because l'm gonna tell you the truth. Not that the truth really matters. But I'm gonna tell you anyway. In the bed apartment, Amos was... zero. I mean, when he made love to me,it goes like... was he fixing a carburetor or something. I love you, honey... Anyway, I start to fool around. And I start screwing around. Which is fooling around without dinner. Then I met Fred Casely. He said he could get me into a bought film. But that didn't quite work out like I planned. I guess it didn't really work out to Fred either. So I gave up the whole idea. lf you can't figure out for all of these, opportunities just pass you by. But... And now, with all this publicity, I got me a world full of yes!